10+3 weeks

Today we went for our private scan. The last scan we have was at 7+6 days and baby was measuring right on track. Well today was no different, baby measuring 3.6cm which keeps our EDD at 17/07/15.

It was definitely the most amazing thing we have ever seen. As soon as the technician put the device on my tummy you could see the gorgeous little thing swimming about inside of me. It was surreal. DH squeezed my hand so tight and I welled up with emotion.

I got to see and hear its little heart beating away at 162bpm. Just wow!!

I’m actually speechless. I don’t really know what to write. I just wanted to update you all with how things are going. It was truly incredible.

I think I will let myself enjoy this as much as possible now. I have my next scan in 2-3 weeks with the NHS and I’ll be back with an update then.

But before I go I just wanted to say thank you to everyone of you for being such a massive support to me. I’m using my Christmas wish on you all this year.

Have a merry Christmas everyone!!




Miracles do happen…..

Today was hands down THE BEST day of my entire life.

Today we got to meet little m&m for the first time.

All day I have been feeling sick to the stomach with nerves. How could things possibly turn out ok? My luck with fertility is pretty poor. I’ve never seen my baby on an ultrasound so that’s what was going to happen today. I think I was just preparing myself for the worst.

We got to the clinic early and sat quietly in a surprisingly empty clinic. I wonder if they are preparing to be closed over Christmas?

I could hear my heart beating. I’m pretty sure everyone else could too. Finally my name was called and we entered the ever so familiar room. The nurse asked me how I was feeling….”pretty fucking crap and shit scared” is what I wanted to say. Instead she got an “ok, but nervous, very very nervous” I was then instructed to go behind the curtain and strip from the waist down as per usual protocol.

I laid there, feet in stirrups looking at the wide eyes of my other half as he tells me everything is going to be ok. I squeeze his hand so tight as the nurse warns me “the jelly might be cold”.

I can’t look.

I begin to cry.

“There you go, here’s your little baby measuring just as it should 7 weeks and 6 days, here’s the umbilical cord aaaand here, well here is its heart beating”

I sob and bawl. I’m hysterical. Oh thank you thank you thank you for answering my prayers and keeping my little miracle safe. It was truly beautiful. I have moments of crying even now.

I am so in love.

Today is a very good day. The best day. And I pray that each and every one of you get to experience this magic for yourselves one day. It will happen, never ever give up.



Lots of love and babydust